Janice VIII Final Climax and Outro

The first climax of the story had left me with my brain unable to process more information. Thus, the final climax had never had such a high impact on me as the first one, but still, this was too much, after that, I was exhausted... and forewer changed.

Into Janice Part V

While I did not discover lesbianism through Janice, this particular scene also had an high impact on me as it was a delicate mix of lesbianism and femdom. Form me it was just reinforcing my belief in the absolute beauty of the feminine body, one I was also longing to have.

Into Janice Part IV

I think it was also Janice who showed me and made me understand the sweetness of a girl's body and of the fetishes that serve to eroticize even more a girl's body. I think this specific picture is one of those who really made me start to become a t-girl in the following years. By imitating this sweetness and eroticism, I was almost half her.

Into Janice Part III

Like everything else, Janice was not providing her lessons in the natural orders of things. At a time when I should have been introduced to normal hardcore, she had decided to show me the world of domination. And after having showed me what it was to be fucked, she gave me a lesson in cocksucking.
You must understand that these were the first hardcore representations I had ever seen back then. I had never seen photographs of hardocre scenes and i had been introduced to this thematic only through those drawings. And this special scene just made me wonder for days and nights about the tastes and smells that would apply to such a situation.

Shock & Awe

And then came the shock...

Soft porn, Comics, TV Series and the girls in the street had been my only source of inspiration in those first years. Never had I had contact to hardcore porn. But what came next was not a gradual step to the next level, it was a quantum leap, straight into the world of... Janice!



I stumbled across this material by chance. I was 13 back then. It had an enormuous impact on me. It turned me on like nothing else. It made me fantasize day and night and kept me hard for hours.

The Turning Point

This drawing was the turning point.
This drawing opened the door to many, many things that would come and that I would love.
What was happening to her? Why was she tied like that? Oh God, it looked so erotic to be tied this way. What does it feel like? She seemed so vulnerable...
And what were those things attached to her body and which seemed to be implanted in her skin? Where these hoses? Who was doing this to her? Where they emptying her of her blood or was she being drugged?
And why was she only wearing this much clothes? Oh... and those breasts! I wanted to have them! I wanted to be her! I wanted something to happen to me too!

Far did I know back then that this was the entrance door to the BDSM world. This picture kept me turned on for months and remained at the top-five of my masturbation fantasies. I played out all the scenarios while being her...

And this picture also made me question something: If women were able to get breast enlargement operations, wouldn't this also be possible for men? It surely had to be so. And if, then I had a chance to maybe have, one day, my own breasts!

In Those Years

In those first years of my sexuality, masturbation revolved around one and the same thing: the female body. But I was not being turned on by the idea of fucking a girl. I was being turned on by sexy women's clothing. Fashion catalogs, and the girls in the street were an invaluable source of inspiration.


I was also being turned on by women who found themselves in a submissive situation. TV series and comics were an invaluable source of inspiration for this. But I did not fantasize about topping a girl. It was the situation the girl was in and the idea of me being her that turned me on.

These first images of sexual inspiration, which served for my first orgasms and sexual fantasies will remain engrained in my memory forever. It is on them that the rest is build upon...

In the following image taken out of a comic, the girl is walking alone at night through a dark street. She soon starts to feel scared and thinks about the possibility of getting raped. This is the kind of situation (of which TV and comic scripts are full of) which imprinted in my sexual brain the higly erotic situation of being a woman.

How it all began

My first encounter with sexuality was when I was around 10 years old. Back then I did not know what I was doing. I was just rubbing my cock very fast. It was an unconscious gesture until something peaked in me, and it felt like I had to urgently pee. Except that I was not peing. That's how I started to masturbate. Although I did not know what that was back then.

I fell in love for the first time when I was about 12 years old. She was a beautiful blonde girl who was sitting next to me in class. The problem was that I was too shy to speak to any girls. Especially a girl for which I had feelings. And when one of those girls came to speak to me, my face was just turning plain red, revealing my emotions in broad daylight.

So I kept looking at girls from a distance and fantasized about them for the next 5 or 6 years. I loved the way they dressed. I loved to see them wearing tight jeans. I loved to see them walk in boots, or heels. I loved to see them play with their jewelry. At night in bed, I just fantasized so much about them, that I even started to imagine that I was one of them. I tried to imagine what it was like to wear those tight jeans and walk around in boots. While fantasizing I was them, I could put them in any situations. It felt great.
It was also in those years that I started to be strangely aroused by specific images I was encountering in magazines as well as in comic books. All those pictures had some common points. They all were showing women in strange situations. I soon started to badly long to be the women I saw. Maybe at first it was to understand them better, and fear them less. But over time, I unconsciously started to realise that being a woman had to feel great. They had so much stuff they could wear. Pants and skirts and heels. What was it like to wear garter belts and stockings? And what about those knee-high boots I saw prostitutes wearing on television?

My first encounter with pornography was a couple of books with artisitc black and white photos of naked women. One serie was showing two lesbians in action. This material was another inspiration for me. I was hypnotized by the female body. By its sweetness and beauty. I wanted to have breasts!

From then on, when I encountered pornographic material, I always looked at the woman and imagined I was her. So much seemed to happen to them. The guys were just standing around them all, naked, and just penetrating the females. But the girls where first of all nicely dressed, in infinite combinations and had beautiful make up. And they did a multiple sort of things: they were sucking cocks, being fucked, they were ejaculated on, had to swallow and so on... Female sexuality seemed thousand times more interesting than male sexuality, especially for someone like me that was just thinking so much about sex.